Umor aviatic

Sunt curios cum se serveste masa

E bine ca l-au pus cat de cat in centru ... altfel se chinuiau pilotii cu avionul inclinat

omg... aparent e de ras, dar pe fond e de plans...

Trebuiau sa fi amenajat o bancuta in cala!

wtf???
Cum a incaput balena pe poarta? S-au l-au bagat pe la trapa de cargo

Pare a fi Boeing...

Probabail ca au mai fost, da tot sunt funny..

Funny Airline Announcements



Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the “in-flight safety lecture” and their other announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real (and some not so real) examples that have been heard or reported:


There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane…”


plane-announcements-funny
In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face.


If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with two or more small children, decide now which one you love more.


As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Washington National, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: “Whoa, big fella. WHOA!”


funny-announcements
From a Southwest Airlines employee…. “Welcome aboard Southwest Flight XXX to YYYY. To operate your seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt, and if you don’t know how to operate one, you probably shouldn’t be out in public unsupervised.


“Should the cabin lose pressure, oxygen masks will drop from the overhead area. Please place the bag over your own mouth and nose before assisting children or adults acting like children.”


“As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.”

laughable-lists-airline
An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a “Thanks for flying XYZ airline.” He said that in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for this little old lady walking with a cane. She said, “Sonny, mind if I ask you a question?” “Why no Ma’am,” said the pilot, “what is it?” The little old lady said, “Did we land or were we shot down?”


“Last one off the plane must clean it.”


And from the pilot during his welcome message: “We are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry… Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight…!”


engine-trouble


Heard on Southwest Airlines just after a very hard landing in Salt Lake City: The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, “That was quite a bump and I know what ya’ll are thinking. I’m here to tell you it wasn’t the airline’s fault, it wasn’t the pilot’s fault, it wasn’t the flight attendants’ fault…it was the asphalt!”


Overheard on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo, Texas, on a particularly windy and bumpy day. During the final approach the Captain was really having to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant came on the PA and announced, “Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo. Please remain in your seats with your seatbelts fastened while the Captain taxis what’s left of our airplane to the gate!”


Part of a flight attendant’s arrival announcement: “We’d like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go zipping through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you’ll think of us here at US Airways.”

syhaya a scris:

...“Sonny, mind if I ask you a question?” “Why no Ma’am,” said the pilot, “what is it?” The little old lady said, “Did we land or were we shot down?”...

Geniala!

Ofer scuze daca acest banc a mai fost postat!
Daca da si este timp puteti da un "remove".

Un elicopter zbura deasupra Seattle-ului cand un deranjament electric i-a dezactivat intregul echipament de navigatie electronica si comunicare. Din cauza norilor si a cetii pilotul nu putea clarifica pozitia si directia elicopterului pentru a ajunge la aeroport, dar a zarit o cladire inalta, a zburat inspre ea, a incercuit-o si a iscalit ceva pe o foaie pe care a tinut-o in geamul elicopterului. In mesajul pilotului scria cu litere mari: "UNDE MA AFLU?". Cei din cladirea inalta s-au grabit sa-i raspunda pilotului si au agatat si ei un mesaj in geam care spunea: "ESTI INTR-UN ELICOPTER." Pilotul a zambit, le-a facut cu mana, si-a consultat harta, a gasit directia spre aeroport si a aterizat cu bine. Dupa aterizare, co-pilotul l-a intrebat pe pilot cum a putut sa-si dea seama unde se aflau in Seattle doar bazandu-se pe mesajul celor din cladire. Pilotul i-a raspuns:
- Mi-am dat seama ca aceea trebuia sa fie cladirea MICROSOFT-ului, deoarece similar serviciului lor de asistenta telefonica, mi-au dat un raspuns absolut corect din punct de vedere tehnic, dar complet inutil.

Cayenne!!! HAHAHA Super!!!

mortal cayenne

cred ca imi pun si eu scari de-astea acasa...

Ce tare )

O fi casa comandantului aeroportului din Sofia?

Pe acolo se urca la mansarda?!

Cum ar fi sa fie asa la Otopeni?

un trip report la londra mai atipic!

Nu am gasit in alta parte filmuletul...

http://stirileprotv.ro/show-buzz/entertainment/no-comment-spectacol-de-a-rasu-plansu-in-avion.html

Alex

omg... era beata, drogata? sau doar cu probleme la scufita?

C_man a scris:

omg... era beata, drogata? sau doar cu probleme la scufita?

Dupa cum scrie si acolo, probleme la "cutia neagra" . Radem noi radem, dar o cucoana din aia, poate sa`ti strice zboru`.

Alex

Pantru cine are de gand sa zboare cu Uzbekistan Airways

Oare chiar o fi adevarat ?

kampfmaschine a scris:

Pantru cine are de gand sa zboare cu Uzbekistan Airways

kayala a scris:

Oare chiar o fi adevarat ?

Nu este Uzbekistan Airways şi nici nu este adevărat. Este o reclamă la o marcă de bere, care a fost folosită înaintea unui meci de fotbal al naţionalei Olandei cu naţionala Austriei (avionul în cauză aducând Austria la Amsterdam).




Edi

Reclama la bere care sa tina trei minute si ceva, care sa fie filmata la o rezolutie demna de cel mult o camera VGA de telefon si in care pasagerii sa reactioneze la modul accesta la vederea cucoanei? Nu as crede.